I wrote a little thing in the RedEye about how casual fast sex doesn’t mean the end of love. But that we have to change the gendered stereotypes we have connected to casual sex so that it stops getting in the way of our love!
“With all this social conditioning tied to sex, we end up with feelings after sex that have little to do with the actual sex and everything to do with how society tells us we should feel about the sex. And those feelings often are not linked to love but to shame or ego-tastic pride or even hate.
But if, as Fisher suggests, times are changing and more people are starting to embrace sex as part of the path to love, then maybe we can shed all this extra weight of the gendered “shoulds” of sex. Maybe if sex could be just sex—something that could mean the start of something awesome but more likely means a decent roll in the hay and a new pancake recipe—then as human beings we would be more free to explore and create our romantic love and attachment.”